I love how putting on a favorite piece of clothing for the first time in ages can automatically make a day better. I got out my cactus green jumper (with pockets!) again and just putting it on made me do a little happy dance in front of my mirror. It brought back all of my memories of buying it in Spain, wearing it while gallivanting around Europe, all of the good times last summer, and all of my excitement for what might happen this summer. It accentuates all of my body parts I love most and makes me feel good about being me. I know not everyone ties their memories and emotions to their clothes, but for me clothes are just plain awesome.

More weird dreams. Last night Tessa, Jamie, Colin and I bought a really awesome mansion. We ate blond brownies with chocolate chips and made plans to put in a swimming pool in the backyard. We could afford it because we were all going to be doctors after graduation and had graduated debt free. There were masses of my clothes all over the place because I was so excited about moving into our awesome new house and to not be living with my family in the fall.

My refrigerator is too warm for my pasta sauce but too cold for my vegetables. This results in either limp, floppy and partially frozen vegetables or moldy pasta sauce; either is inedible. It also doesn't have a good vegetable crisper, otherwise I would use that and not have this problem. It's seriously lame, methinks.

Had a really strange set of dreams last night, involving a grad party where I served boiled potatoes and got lots of presents, including a gigantic anime mylar balloon and a dance performance in a garden that appeared in my living room and had really awesome lighting. I didn't get to open any of the other presents :( There was also a boy at the party, and we sat together on my bed. He had taken my diary (the one I haven't written in in ages) and made sweet comments in the margins and made me feel all warm and fuzzy and who was very much in love with me. Then he became a she, but was still the same person in my head, and we were in some sort of free bagel giveaway in what looked kinda like the staircase of Wilson library. There was a very intense discussion at a huge conference table, but I don't remember what it was about. For some reason the boy who was a girl said that s/he had seen me naked (as an argument in the discussion), and my only response was to say "my nose is twitching."
Then I woke up and couldn't figure out where my presents were.

After spending lots of time with friend Kayla talking about what makes for good espresso, I am disappointed to report that my latte from Nina's had lots of grounds in it. That means that there was either too much espresso in the filter, or that it was tamped too hard, preventing the steam from flowing through properly. Sad day.

I decided to take advantage of having a car for one last day (sigh, at least for a while...) to come to Saint Paul and check out Nina's Cafe. I've been here once before, ages ago, but that was more to chat than to do work and now I'm trying it as a place to do work. It's a bit noisy, but my latte is pretty good and there's some good people watching. And a bookstore downstairs! Now all I have to do is actually get some work done, and life will be perfect-ish.

This is earlier than I've gone to bed in a while, and I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. Also, I lost at scrabble tonight. Spectacularly.

I'm going to graduate with 194 credits. 120 is the minimum. Huh.

So, (with the exception of one silly distance learning course that doesn't finish until June 15th)

I'M A COLLEGE GRADUATE!

WHeeeeee!

My apartment is cleaner now than it's ever been since I moved back in. It's kinda freaking me out. Grandparents and parents coming over for lunch will do that for you, though.

Thesis writing complete. Sweater/shrug to wear to graduation on Sunday almost complete.

Viggo Mortensen is an amazing actor. Just watched Eastern Promises for the first time, and wow is that bathhouse fight seen impressive.

Audition tomorrow, therefore bedtime now.

Crisis hopefully averted, assuming either the miracle of fax machines or the department secretary and her magical rubber stamp signature can come through for me.

Holy shit, I might be screwed. One of my readers is getting on a plane for Seattle today, and I need her signature saying I finished my thesis and can graduate, but she hasn't even seen it yet. Oh, and it's not finished. Life as a procrastinator is so fabulous...

I have 7777 words right now. That has to mean something fabulous, right?

The end is in sight and it is 16 pages, one really-awesome-but-as-yet-undetermined title, and negative two days away.

Oh, wait. Shit.

I mean, I only really needed to finish on Monday so my readers would have time to read it. The actual deadline is Friday, and I guess my readers are just going to have to suck it up and read it in two days. And I'm going to write 16 really kick-ass pages and edit this thing in the next 18 hours, so I can get it emailed out to them by 9 am tomorrow.

Sweet jesus, I just want to be done.

How is it 2:30 AM already? And how do I only have 11 pages?!?

Super busy night at work (everyone else is trying to finish their papers, too), which meant that I didn't get much work done over the past few hours. The girl I've tutored twice a week all semester gave me a really sweet card that made my night. Now I'm at Espresso Royale for a few more minutes (they close at midnight), drinking lots and lots of black tea and eating a croissant with gouda so my stomach doesn't go crazy.

Page count: 10 of 40
Hours left: 16.5

The end is in sight and it is 32 pages and 24 hours away. And I'm going to work for the next 4 hours.


Wait, what? Uhhhh...Shit.

Tomorrow's my last day of class as an undergrad. It will be weird, and won't even be a normal class day, since two classes are canceled and the other might be either a really good modern class, or kinda mediocre modern class like they've been all week. We'll have a barbecue, maybe in the snow. Usually that ends up being a nice outside party where everyone lets off steam and says goodbye to the seniors, but I'm not sure what will happen if it's inside. Then there's an awards ceremony where the department recognizes all of the seniors and celebrates the year. Then, since it's my Mom's birthday, she and my Dad and I are going out to dinner and then to the Guthrie. It should all be a lot of fun, but really wipes out tomorrow in terms of getting work done.

This all feels so surreal. It's just the end of another semester, in one way, but it's also the end of the last semester, which means that now I've got to do real person things. I might never see some of these people again, and I'm realizing now, as it's all ending, just how much I like them and how big of a part of my life they are. But I can't even freak out about that, yet, because I've got to worry about my thesis and so many other things before I can even begin to think about finding a real person job or keeping in touch. I'm operating with a one thing at a time mindset, hopefully that will get me through.

You'll probably hear a lot from me over the next few days, as I procrastinate and get frustrated with my thesis and then (eventually) finish it. I have to have it done by Monday, so my readers can get a chance to read it and comment before signing off on it on Friday.

Life just feels so important right now, like this is a make or break moment, or something. Doors closing and opening and all that jazz.

Pages done: kinda 11
Pages to go: at least 29
Time left: 3 days and 17 hours