Why I still haven't written 10 pages of my thesis

Things that make for a productive day:
-Getting out of bed.
-Only wearing pajamas for 20 minutes after getting out of bed.
-Making said bed so it's slightly harder for you to collapse back into it.
-Eating at appropriate times so you don't spend the entire day thinking about food.
-Being overwhelmed by how much you have to get done that day. This inspires further procrastination and also makes you do a few small things so you don't feel quite so bad.
-Doing your French homework 12 hours before it's due.

Things that do not make for a productive day:
-Becoming obsessed with Yarn Harlot and deciding to read all of her backdated entries. All 5 years of them.
-Deciding to design your own baby sweater for your friend's friend who is due any day now. Of course this means lots of time spent on Ravelry, looking at stitch dictionaries, and fantasizing about perfect little baby boy sweaters.
-Remembering that you promised your Mom that you'd make her cousin a scarf. Spending several hours picking out lacy scarf patterns when you know that your Mom's cousin tends to wear 80s-style acid-washed jeans and oversize sweaters and turtlenecks and will only care about how warm the scarf is. And will coo about how wonderful it is for at least 10 minutes, no matter what it looks like.
-Not having Word because you just got a new computer and wanted to save money by using OpenOffice.org only to discover that OO.o won't download to your laptop, and that when it does, your laptop won't recognize it as a file. You know this, because you've downloaded it and tried to open it. Three times.
-Finding Summit Winter Ale on closeout at the local liquor store. Bringing it home with you on the city bus and trying to make it last as long as possible.
-Being a world-class procrastinator who is forever perfecting her skills.

Knitting projects fantasized about casting on: 32
Knitting projects you don't actually have the yarn for: 31.4
Imaginary sweaters you've designed today (despite the fact that you've never designed anything before): 3
Number of pages of senior thesis written so far today: 0 (but it's still early)